Here's what you've forgotten:
* Rick Nash (yes, I'm going to wikilink everyone) is now a New York Ranger. Brandon Dubinsky, Artem Anisimov and Tim Erixon went the other way. After spending his whole career with the miserable Blue Jackets, we'll finally get to see Nash play for a real NHL team. It's a damn shame Columbus sucks so much; that thing they did when they fired a cannon every time the team scored in the playoffs was awesome. I hope they smash some of the Southeast teams next time there's a real season so we can make gratuitous civil war references. Heck, General Sherman was actually from Ohio. Such a shame there was never a Blue Jackets team before the Flames relocated.
* Luke Schenn (I wasn't kidding) is now in Philadelphia. Somehow, the Leafs got James van Riemsdyk in return.
* In other brother-uniting news, Jordan Staal was traded to the Hurricanes. I had genuinely forgotten this.
* Mike Ribeiro is now in Washington.
* Jaromír Jágr is in Dallas. He signed a one-year deal with them last summer. Jágr, 40, has more career regular season goals (665) and points (1653) than any other European player; his regular season scoring total of 149 from the 1996-97 season is the highest of any European player in the NHL. Right behind him is Teemu Selänne, age 42, with 663 goals and 1406 points. So Teemu only needs three more goals than Jágr to pass him in the all-time scoring race. I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say that we consider this by far the most important thing to watch in the coming season. Teemu, by the way, is the reigning Winter Olympics all-time scoring leader, and he shares the all-time record for most goals scored in a single regular season by a European player with... who? For more trivia, name the only European player other than Teemu and Jágr to score over 600 career goals. C'mon, everybody knows this one.
By the way, last time there was a lockout-shortened season, Jágr won the Art Ross trophy with 70 points (32+38) in 48 games. As near as I can tell, the only players to have gone through all three NHL lockouts are Teemu, Jágr, Martin Brodeur, Ray Whitney and the current active leader in games played, with 1379, Roman Hamrlík. I'm not counting Chris Pronger, as I'm afraid he isn't likely to play in the NHL again.
There's some other interesting stuff to look forward to as well. Remember the realignment? It got trashed in the run-up to the latest lockout, but it still has to get done, because the Jets are still in the Southeast division, and that's silly. Surely now that there's a CBA and everything they can have reasonable negotiations about realignment. Right?
Anyway, I'm just excited that the NHL is back. If we can make a request, can everyone at Anaheim games shout "One more year" at Teemu so he can play in the 2014 Olympics? That would probably also make sure he passes Jágr on the all-time scoring list. We would like that.